Our Brave Friend

When I heard our friend had breathed her last breath, the first words that came to my mind were, “She was brave.”  I have never before described one of my companions experiencing dementia as “brave,” though all of them have been.

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Sacred Work

Society may paint another picture, but spending time with people experiencing dementia is sacred work I get to do. The DAWN Method has taught me how to provide the right type of care in the right amounts. 

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My Why

Did you know? It was my grandmother’s heartbreaking journey with dementia that inspired me to learn how to get care “right” through the DAWN method.  As I walk through this journey with my dad, I am even more convinced about the importance of keeping people in their homes. This is often best for the individual and their family, and there…

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Thoughts On Attention Skills

If you’re loved one experiencing dementia is doing things like you see in the pictures above, please understand that they are not doing that to make your life more difficult.They have diminishing attention skills, and something else draws their attention away. Check out the video for more thoughts. https://www.instagram.com/p/C6ZqhPeOTtG

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My Pianist

This video was recorded 6 months before my friend drew her last breath. This is what it looks like when we allow people experiencing dementia to live in their own homes in a dementia, supportive environment. Listen, and be blessed. https://www.instagram.com/p/C6O-PSgupJf

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What It Looks Like When We Get It Right

DAWN Method dementia supportive care is how we preserve the skill, ability, and, most importantly, well-being of folks experiencing dementia. DAWN dementia supportive care looks like us enjoying time with a person doing things that are meaningful and beautiful to them to bring personal sensory and social stimulation, and also tending to the practical and physical aspects of their life such…

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Stories Over Stress

Stories are so important. By remembering the stories my companions share, I can bring them joy and richness when they no longer remember, and I can share these stories with them. Sharing stories lowers stress for my companions. I can also accomplish this by sharing stories I’ve seen, read about, or encountered in my day. Check out the video for…

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Living At Home

People are often surprised when they hear that those experiencing dementia can continue to live in their own homes. With the right type of care presented in the right way at the right time, we can achieve this.  I’d love to share more about what the DAWN method has taught me and how it has helped these individuals live a…

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“You Showed ‘Em”

In our years of bringing her DAWN Dementia Specialist care, we skillfully and respectfully built the right kind of care, care that she would accept and come to value.  It was a process, as anosognosia required delicate skill while we worked to preserve her strong sense of independence and autonomy.

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Be With Them

This holds true for people experiencing dementia as well. Much more than a solution for whatever might be causing them stress, people need empathy and someone willing to be with them.  ♥️

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End of Life Care

We recently have had the privilege of walking through end-of-life care with several of our companions. I have been reminded of how different the end-of-life journey is when someone is experiencing dementia.  With dementia, they do not necessarily have the cognitive ability to advocate for themselves as their ability to understand how they are feeling and what to do about…

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Keeping it Simple

We don’t always have to come up with grand things to do with our companions who are experiencing dementia.  Going somewhere as simple as the hardware store can create a rich place for sensory and social experiences. Even while some of their cognitive skills are diminishing, their brains still benefit from some stimulation! https://www.instagram.com/p/CzEjYg1OaS6/

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Lessons in Preparing Dinner

I want to share this quick story on my recent experience preparing dinner with a companion with dementia!  This companion may be experiencing cognitive change, but she can still maintain autonomy and independence in everyday tasks like cutting strawberries! https://www.instagram.com/reel/Cyn_HF2ulvm/?igshid=MzRlODBiNWFlZA==

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Working WITH Dementia

The DAWN Method has taught me how to work WITH dementia. To create an atmosphere that preserves dignity, self-respect, a sense of autonomy, independence, control, and more for those experiencing cognitive change due to dementia.In this way, they can continue to feel like human beings with value and skill! For that, I am grateful! https://www.instagram.com/p/CygD407utOV/

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Living Well With Dementia

Join us for Living Well With Dementia: a Half Day of Learning! A dementia diagnosis brings fear and uncertainty. Hopelessness, chaos, and exhaustion are often part of the journey. Yet when we know how to work with dementia, we can be proactive and preserve the well-being of both the person living with it and their companions. Join us for a…

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A Personal Dementia Story

Sharing my personal perspective today. My dad has dementia, but because I have set up a dementia-supportive and understanding environment, he will always know who I am. He has learned by experience that when I show up, he can trust me and share happy times.  The DAWN method has created this safe space for us to share time together despite…

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Weight Loss with Aging & Dementia

It is a topic that brings a lot of concern. Sometimes, the individual is still healthy, eating good meals, and taking care of themselves, but losing weight.  This can be a natural part of dementia/aging for some people, becoming less interested in food and filling up more quickly. Listen to the video for more! Additionally, check out this great article…

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Strength-Based Care

Our companions with dementia have lost some significant cognitive skills, but we can set the environment up to accommodate those losses and support their strengths. For example, one of my companions has a very important cognitive strength that he gets to live out with our help. He gets to enjoy the beauty of his life and specifically his backyard and…

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Adapting to Changes

A quick story about how what I learned with the DAWN method has helped me better understand the actions of my companions with dementia. What I have learned allows me to suggest things that improve their quality of life and adapt to their changing cognitive state.  https://www.instagram.com/p/Ctjqva5gNZl/

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Preserving Dignity

The DAWN method taught me the sacred balance between safety and selfhood. I am so grateful to Judy Cornish and all that I have learned. In my experience with my companions with dementia, I have learned first-hand that full-time care is not always the answer. I have seen how the right care, in the right amounts, at the right time,…

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Honoring A Good Man

“Thank you for your service, Sir.”  He served in the United States Army, as a Field Artillery soldier.  And he served for decades in the Colorado Parks and Wildlife, helping preserve wildlife and wild lands for people to enjoy for generations to come.   In his later years, he took up painting and was good at it, too.  He continued riding…

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Why the DAWN Method Works

People who watch us interact with their loved ones can sometimes be surprised by how peaceful our interactions are. It looks peaceful because it is! The DAWN method taught us how to create a situation in which our companions feel safe and secure and in which we can bring well-being into their lives.  If you want to learn more about…

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Our Gracious Southern Friend

She grew up in the North.  The great Midwest, to be exact, but when her husband and kids settled in her husband’s native state of Louisiana, she embraced the genteel and gracious ways of the South.  Her home felt like walking into a Southern Living magazine and caused you to enjoy a deep breath of peaceful style.   She was a…

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Dementia Care With a Smile

I read the humorous quote above with my companion with dementia the other day.  She has advanced dementia, yet we both laughed.  In fact, she asked me to read it again, and we laughed a second time as well. I am well aware that my companion’s ability to understand words is changing.  I am aware that her changing rational thinking…

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In Memory of Sally

Our companions experiencing dementia teach us so much, and we are grateful. Click on the link below for a glimpse into the beauty of the work we at Better People Care are privileged to do; using the tools of The DAWN Method to make the dementia journey ok. https://youtu.be/39LJ2AqE7RQ

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A Message of Hope

There is hope in the dementia journey. Our companions with dementia can still have a good quality of life and wellbeing even as their cognitive skills change. Even as they experience dementia, there is an opportunity for hope, beauty, and many sweet times together. This is where the DAWN method makes all the difference. Reach out for more information! https://www.instagram.com/p/CrLe1H2AFMw/

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Creating Deeper Relationships

Sharing a quick personal story with you today! When visiting with our folks with dementia if we listen well for common phrases they say and use them back with them it resonates. We can memorize the rhythm of what they say and use it back with them to create deeper relationships and intimacy! https://www.instagram.com/p/CqvQFB0tWty/

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Treating Pain

Treating pain is important, especially for those experiencing dementia. As dementia progresses, they lose the ability to assess, interpret, and express their pain accurately. Instead, we might see this paid come out in other actions. It is never a bad idea to consider their pain and treat that pain as needed. Check out the video below! https://www.instagram.com/p/CqlRrgHgD6k/

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Pressure isn’t helpful.

Pressure isn’t helpful. This is a quick reminder to be gentle and sensitive when connecting with a spouse serving as the caregiver.  Remember that if your loved one is experiencing dementia, they do not understand that they need help and most likely will not welcome this help. This is where caregiving by stealth is so important.  Reach out for more…

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Take a Deep Breath

This video is a quick reminder to be kind in situations that might be frustrating for you as a caregiver. Our friends experiencing dementia want to take good care of their surroundings and have good intentions in what they do, but often their diminishing cognitive skills get in the way.  For example, they might leave a cupboard door hanging open…

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Why what we say matters.

When spending time with one of my companions experiencing dementia, it matters how I communicate with them. They are losing contact with the recent past as their memory skills are changing. So when preparing my greeting, I thought about how I could stay in the "moment of now." For example, she will not remember the weather over the past few…

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Enjoy Your Mom, Joe

My friend Joe called me a few weeks ago.  He was on the way to his mom’s home in another state; on his way to sort through the long list of things he needed to do on her behalf, as her Power of Attorney and devoted son. He was calling to say thank you; thank you for encouraging him months…

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If Life were a Movie Reel

If Life were a Movie Reel
Green flower in the woods on sunlight. Sunflare and hellebore in forest. Natural seasonal landscape using as backgrounds or wallpapers. Perspective of beautiful scenery plants in nature.

We live our daily lives with a connection to what has happened before and anticipation of what will happen in the future. Those experiencing dementia have diminishing cognitive skills and lose this connection to the past & future. Therefore it is like they are living their lives one movie frame at a time. As their dementia progresses, they will experience…

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The Moment of Now

The DAWN method taught me that with dementia, 3 primary skills are being lost, and 3 primary skills are being kept. Knowing this helps us understand the way a person experiencing dementia behaves.  Two examples of this are:  Losing memory skills - which means they can reminisce well about the past, but lose connection with what just happened.  Diminishing rational…

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The Gift of Time

The best gift we can give our companions with dementia is time, especially in conversations. When speaking with a companion experiencing dementia, don’t rush to fill the open space. Instead, be patient, watch them, and give them time to respond. Watch for a flicker of understanding that lets you know they are thinking and avoid the tendency to fill the…

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An Encouragement to Healthcare Workers

An encouragement for those working in healthcare!🩺 My experience in spending time with companions with dementia has given me some insight. Here's my advice: 1. From the first moment of your encounter, smile, eye contact, and greet them well.  2. Don’t start by asking questions when meeting someone with dementia. Cognitive change makes those questions difficult for them, challenging the…

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Driving Safely as We Age

Anosognosia is the “lack of ability to perceive the reality of one’s own condition.”  (Healthline.com; Tim Jewell; 2/27/2019). Because of this, people with dementia have some awareness that things in their lives are changing, but they have no idea how their cognitive changes are impairing their ability to do daily tasks. Check out the video below. May we learn how…

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A Change is Needed

In December I shared a blog on long-term care insurance, you can read that here. In continuing the conversation with an individual, we discussed how benefits can pay well but only if the person moves into a facility. Long-term care benefits do not pay well when someone remains in their home. But research shows us these people want to remain…

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Slowing Down

Why do I talk at a slower pace? The pace at which we talk to our companions with dementia matters. It is important to make good eye contact, speak slowly and clearly, speak loudly enough that they can hear you, and articulate well! Don’t forget the impact a gentle smile can have. 😀 They have not lost intellect, they just…

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Living or Dying in Dementia

If you have read my blog posts for a while, you know that I wonder, and I ponder sometimes.  I wonder while I spend time with those living with dementia.  I ponder about society and how we are doing with caring for our elders.  I wonder about our society’s thoughts about life, living, end of life, and end of living.…

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Why The DAWN Method Works

You may have read about our friend Sally, who passed away on July 31st of this year.  She lived alone in her own home, until the final four days of her life, while she was actively dying.  She had dementia and was fiercely independent.  Our team had the privilege of helping her live life her way, and die her way. …

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The Loving Life of Sally

Some people enter our lives and leave impressions that will remain.  Sally was like that. She loved life.  She loved people.  She loved animals, yoga, walking, music, art, and color.  She especially loved her precious family and her lifelong friends. My team and I had the privilege of knowing her in her final years when dementia made care and support…

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Our Good Friend Mr. J

Did you know that John Wayne’s real name was Marion Robert Morrison, or that Johnny Cash and Billy Graham were dear friends?  We did not know this either until we became friends with Mr. J, who was a John Wayne aficionado and a Johnny Cash fan. Did you know that the Fort Collins/Loveland airport is home to AIMS Community College…

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To Dementia Caregivers

I recently had the privilege of teaching a few classes for the University of Nebraska Lifelong Learning Program.  One class was about dementia, and how to get it right with dementia care, using the tools of the DAWN Method.   My goal with the class was to bring hope, ideas, and real practical tools.  And I did that.  But I also…

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Older Folks And Classic Cars

I think this blog is more of a question than anything else.  More of an invitation for readers, people, and society to ponder with me. When a car shows wear and tear, we repair what needs repairing, replace parts, and give it what it needs to keep working.  When a car gets really old, we call it a classic; we…

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“Oh Versus No”

There are many times in conversation when we say the word “no.”  We are a fact-based, reality-oriented society, after all, so it is natural to say “no” when we need to correct someone or bring pure facts into our conversation. But the word “no” can become a barrier to a peaceable relationship when one of us has dementia.  You see,…

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A Dementia Epiphany

We are not full-time caregivers. We acknowledge that at the end of our designated time with our companions with dementia, we go to our homes.  We are for sure mindful of the demands, fatigue, grief, uncertainty, and mix of emotions that come with being a caregiver.  We do our best to support caregivers equally as much as we support the…

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When Anticipation Is Not A Gift

For those of us with healthy brains, it is fun to anticipate having time with those we love.  It is exciting to plan and organize and prepare for an upcoming vacation.  Sometimes the excitement of anticipation ends up being every bit as thrilling as the actual event itself. We watch the world narrow for our loved ones with dementia, and…

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What Is Strength-Based Dementia Care?

When we understand that not all cognitive skills are lost with dementia, we can provide strength-based care.  People with dementia retain three useful cognitive skills, their intuitive, learning by experience, and mindlessness skills.  When we learn how to use them to their advantage, we can provide strength-based care.   When we provide strength-based care, we are able to provide care that…

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How I will Miss My Favorite Hand Warmer: A Tribute To Our Friend Carol

Our good friend Carol passed away this week, surrounded by friends and family.  Her best friend and care partner loved her through the dementia journey, in their own home, until her last week of life when inpatient hospice was the way to help her be comfortable.   Carol was a remarkable woman; an accomplished musician, a mom of six, one who…

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The Role of Empathy in Dementia Care

Empathy is a cornerstone for how the Better People Care team gets it right with dementia care.  Empathy-the action of understanding, being aware of, being sensitive to, and vicariously experiencing the feelings, thoughts, and experience of another of either the past or present without having the feelings, thoughts, and experience fully communicated in an objectively explicit manner.Merriam-Webster Dictionary Extending empathy…

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Caregiver vs. DAWN Dementia Specialist Companion – Why The Difference Matters

The folks we provide DAWN dementia specialist care to have lived at least six decades. Meaning they have cared for themselves, made independent decisions, and led their own lives well for a very long time. We understand, then, that rarely will they welcome the notion of “help.”In addition, most have anosognosia, where the part of the brain that gives people…

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When People Die

A friend asked me recently, “how can you do that work when you have so many people die?”She is correct; my team and I regularly spend our workdays with folks who are living through their final season of life. And we often remain in their lives until they breathe their last. Since December 1 of 2020, four of the people…

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A Promise to Myself

Getting it right with dementia is what I have the privilege of doing each day. But it is also very personal for me, and the heart behind my efforts on behalf of those living with dementia. I’ve written about my Grandmother before, in my blog titled, “She Loved Life”. In that blog, I spoke about what she meant to me,…

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Getting Paid to Have Fun

I was visiting with some new friends recently, most of whom have some idea of the work I do.  One asked if I had worked the previous day, which happened to be a Sunday.  I said, “Yes.  And my friend (with dementia) and I went for three walks, and for a drive in the mountains, and out for lunch, and…

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My Dad the Servant Leader

Living most of my time in my dad’s community has allowed me to hear many stories about the impactful ways my dad has influenced and brought quiet leadership, encouragement, and service to others.   I knew my dad was involved in various community groups, but I did not know he made such a difference.  I am grateful to have had such…

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Getting To Know My Dad

I remembered, “Oh yeah, he is responding positively to me joking with him and gently kidding him because that is how he so often related to me and my kids.”  That was a fun revelation because now we smile and laugh when I act like him with my playful antics.

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Gratitude for My Dad

I coach and train a lot of families in how to care for their loved ones experiencing dementia using the DAWN Method.  I always include the DAWN message that dementia is the season when expressing respect, admiration, and love are ways we give our loved ones a sense of well-being.  

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 Full Participation/Occupational Therapy and Dementia

I realized not long ago how the work I do now, using the DAWN Method to maximize the lives of my companions experiencing dementia, is the purest version of Occupational Therapy I've practiced in my extensive career. Occupational therapy is the art and science of "participation," a crucial tool in helping individuals fully engage in the "occupations (activities, tasks, jobs,…

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