I recently had the privilege of teaching a few classes for the University of Nebraska Lifelong Learning Program. One class was about dementia, and how to get it right with dementia care, using the tools of the DAWN Method.
My goal with the class was to bring hope, ideas, and real practical tools. And I did that. But I also received feedback on the evaluation from one participant who wrote that I did not acknowledge the difficulty in caregiving, the load that it brings, and the difficulty in finding the right help.
This participant is right. I did not take enough time to acknowledge the reality that caregiving is not easy. That dementia care is not easy. That it requires skill and great contribution of oneself and devotion and sacrifice. My team and I talk about this fact: that even though we are DAWN Dementia Care Specialists, this is still dementia, and it is often not easy.
I sometimes get so focused on bringing hope, tools, and strategies I know will be helpful for caregivers, that I forget to slow down, pause, and take adequate time to look a caregiver in the eye and let them know that they are not lost, they are not forgotten.
To everyone reading this who is a caregiver for those living with dementia, I am writing to you to tell you that you are not lost, you are not forgotten, and my team and I are here for you. Even if you live somewhere besides Northern Colorado, we are here to coach, listen, and walk alongside you to make your situation easier. To help you understand what dementia changes and how we can meet the emotional needs of someone with dementia. How we can help make them more comfortable, and you too can be comfortable in the journey. It is still dementia, and the journey won’t be easy, but it can be more comfortable.
I apologize for when it seems that I am not seeing you. Our goals are to help you, by teaching you how to help your loved one with dementia. I give you permission to ask me to stop, to slow down, to look you in the eye, and be with you.
We truly are with you.
Humbly,
Jill
©Jill Couch
Thank you for all that you are doing to help us journey through this and for all the assistance you provided to Jill and my mom before her passing. The information you provide is so very valuable and it certainly did help us.
Sincerely,
Mark Rittenour
You are welcome, Mark. It is an honor to do this special work, for people like your Mom and Jill.